This weekend my niece is getting married. She is a beautiful, amazing and intelligent girl ( well she's a woman but she will always be a girl to me ) and she is walking down the isle on Saturday to begin a new life with the man she loves. Because I live so far away, and we are on an extremely fixed income, I can not attend her very special day, and as very difficult that this may be, she knows that I am there in thought and spirit as she embarks on this new and special chapter of her life and how very much I love her.
It astounds me how fast life goes. I remember when she was just little, and I used to babysit her and her brother while my sister and her husband were at work. She was such an adorable little girl with long dark hair and a rascal smile, and to this day that smile is infectious, as is her laughter. When she starts laughing, you can't help but join right in. And to think that on Saturday, she will be saying her vows, and facing a life with her new husband. It really seems like only yesterday she was carving her initials in to her Mom and Dad's antique bureau while I was supposed to be watching her. And when I caught her, and my heart was beating a hundred miles an hour, thinking that her Dad would probably find countless ways to murder me and do away with the body, she gave me that glowing, what did I do smile.
So as an Auntie, what advice would I give to her on Saturday before she faces that walk down the isle to her new love? Well, this is what I would tell her......
Love like there is no tomorrow. We only have today, and its better to love with all your heart than to hold anything back.
Be yourself. Have your own thoughts, opinions and convictions. If he loves you, he will admire this in you. He will never want to hold you back from being everything you can be and more.
Trust. This can be a hard one. But trust is the foundation to every relationship. Unless there is a reason not to, trust will see you through.
Let yourself be loved. Let him be your soul mate, your best friend, your lover and your caregiver. Never feel guilty for these things. You feel that way for him, he feels the same for you.
Love yourself. No one can love you unconditionally until you love yourself. Remind yourself that he chose you because of how amazing you are. Remember that you are an intelligent, beautiful, funny and gracious woman who has so much warmth and an amazing heart. Remember this about yourself always.
Don't let others bring you down. Unfortunately in life, there will always be those that try and hurt those that they feel are better than they. Keep these people far away. Negativity only breeds negativity. Surround yourself with only those that bring positivity and joy in to your lives, and that are truly happy for you and your success every step of the way. These are the same people that will also be there when the chips are down.
Be one another's best friend.
Don't go to bed angry.
Always share your feelings. Never keep something inside. It will only fester and grow. Getting it out in the open allows for discussion. Sure you may not agree with one another, but at least you will know where the other stands.
Don't keep secrets.
Don't try to control one another. It only breeds resentment. Marriage is a partnership. You want the best for one another. Controlling someone only undermines the bond of two.
Hold hands, and kiss each other good morning and good night every single day.
And most importantly, always remember your Auntie is here for you. No matter what time, or where you are, I am here for you always and may God bless you on your beautiful day.