I think achieving the work life balance is very important. But it is something extremely difficult to achieve. As I was coming up my front walkway a few evenings ago, I noticed a single rose was still blooming.
And what made me sad about it, is that I haven't had time to appreciate all the changes that have been going on around me the last few weeks. We have gone from the brilliant colors of autumn to the bare bones of winter and frost and I haven't had a chance to take it all in.
I have put the importance of being the perfect wife and mother before what it really means to live. I once saw on a friends facebook a little saying that they have hung in their home. It said " Excuse the messy house, we live here. " And you know what? It's true. We do live here. All five of us plus 2 dogs and a cat. And that means there will be dirt at the front door, and dishes in the sink, and laundry here and there. I have been putting all the pressure on myself to make sure all is running smoothly. I have a hard time accepting help in the house if it isn't done to my standards. And that just isn't right.
So I am trying to teach myself that it isn't a reflection on me personally if the bed isn't made or the laundry isn't done. It's more important that I have those moments with my kids. Smelling the roses, playing with our rabbits, or going for a walk on a crisp November day with my husband as the sun reflects over a quiet lake as evening sets in.
Last Sunday my husband and I decided to drop all the chores that needed to be done and hit the road for awhile. We got ourselves lost on the dirt roads of Meteghan and just enjoyed the wonderful scenery and peace that abounds in the backwoods. We came across the remains of an old sawmill and the village that was once there, disappearing in to the landscape.
I love life and I love nature. I love my husband and I love my kids. Those are my priorities and those are my reason for being. And most of all, those are the things that bring me my own personal bliss.
So going forward, my house is going to be messier than it once was. Once in awhile, we will eat Mac and Cheese for supper, and Horror of Horrors, the bed may not be made. But I will be happy because I have gone and spent a few extra hours outdoors with my kids, finding the beauty of the forest, and appreciating the time we have together.